Studies show ~70% of people feel stuck some way in their life. They have habits they can’t quit and a lifestyle they can’t break. If you feel stuck in life, you have to change the actions you have been taking. You have created your current life with the accumulation of the actions you have taken. It is a encouraging reminder that you are in control of your life.
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Take ownership of your life
Your life is a direct reflection of the mindset you have built. If someone has negative thoughts about marriage, then don’t be surprised they have difficulty committing in a relationship. Don’t be surprised that you are taking actions that are contrary to the results that want. This is part of the reason you feel stuck in life. You do not have a proper understanding of the link between thought and action. The first step to freeing yourself is to limit the actions that create the results you don’t want and to increase the actions that create the results you do want.
What is important to you?
When I am coaching people or creating financial plans, I often start with the question – what is important to you? Then depending on that answer is where the conversation starts. However, as the conversation continues, it sometimes becomes clear the goal they mentioned in the beginning is not what is most important to them. Then we will revisit the question of what is important to you?
Now, they have been talking for a few minutes, they have a better understanding of what is important to them. Oftentimes, society has taught you what you should be concerned about and you repeat it without much thought. It is not until you listen to yourself share your passions, concerns and interests that you realize you care about other things. If you don’t recognize what is important to you, you are going to be chasing someone else’s goals and will definitely feel stuck in life.
How do you need to change?
Once you know what you want in your personal and professional life, are you worthy of your goal? Not worthy in a personal way, but have invested in yourself so you are set up for success. For a promotion, you may need to add a certification or transfer to a different department. In your personal life, you may need to move out of your parent’s house to have a serious relationship. There are steps you need to take to successfully change your life. While some steps are more obvious than others, it is important to invest in yourself to make your dream come true.
Align your goals
There is always an opportunity cost to accomplishing your goals. To make sure you do not feel stuck in life, take the necessary time to plot your course. Along your way, you are going to realize your goals change and there are some detours as well. You want to make sure you are not setting contradictory goals.
For example, someone who wants to spend more time with their family, while also wanting to be promoted. If they plotted the course to being promoted, they may realize they needed to work more hours and commit to traveling more. To successfully be promoted, you may need to spend less time with your family. This can also be true for that special someone with whom you want to spend the rest of your life. You may want someone who is driven and can challenge you to greatness, while also wanting someone who will enjoy vacations and traveling. Most driven people I know find it hard to take vacations before they have reached a significant level of success.
Prioritize your time
In each of these situations, you are going to feel stuck in life because you are only able to achieve one goal at a time. When you are achieving one, you are losing the other. Therefore, you are never completely satisfied with your life because you always feel like something is missing. To resolve this issue, prioritize your goals as you map out your course so you can achieve them at different points in your life.
The most common illustration of this is the jar filled with boulders, small rocks and sand. The only way for you fit everything in the jar is to put the boulders in first, then the small rocks and then the sand. It is a reminder of your need to prioritize how you spend your life. You need to have short term and medium term goals that are aligned with your life goals. By focusing on your long-term goals, you will find purpose in the small steps of today that don’t provide much immediate benefit. There are going to be times you feel stuck in life because you are taking action that does not serve a long-term purpose.
If you feel tuck in life it is because you do not feel as though you are progressing towards anything. You feel you are taking actions without purpose and meaning, and as a result, it is hard to gauge success. When people are not confident what their inner drum beat of happiness is telling them, it is hard to chase happiness each day. When you are clear on the life goals you are achieving, it will be easier to gauge your life through the prism of years instead of days. You can have bad days, but you can still progress towards your life goal and have a great year. Keep chasing happiness by rising to the challenge and you will realize each small win amounts to massive success.
Until next time,
Dre “Better Self, Better Wealth” Griggs