If you have children or enjoy animated movies, then you have likely heard of the movie “Trolls”. The story follows the troll princess (Poppy) and the village pessimist (Branch) as they try to save a handful of trolls from being eaten by the Bergens.
The reason the Bergens eat the trolls is because they believe it is the only way they can be happy. They live every day in misery, patiently waiting for an opportunity to eat a troll so they can feel “true happiness”.
While they are “happy” immediately after they eat the troll, the happiness is short-lived. It is not until the end of the movie when Poppy helps the Bergens to realize happiness was inside of them the entire time.
The reason most people are not “happy” is because they believe happiness is achieved by external means. While we all feel really good when we get that gift or present we always wanted, that is not true happiness; so the feeling fades.
If you truly want to be happy, you need to:
- Believe happiness is an internal choice, not an external reaction (your beliefs directly impact your actions).
- Be content in outcome, without being complacent in effort (you are not worried about external praise, acceptance, or appreciation).
- Find joy in success and failure (There is always a lesson, revelation, etc. from your experiences, don’t waste your failures).
- Forgive yourself and others (show me someone holding a grudge, I will show you someone who is the void of happiness).
- Find two things to be grateful for whenever you face one thing that is discouraging (we lose perspective in the moment).
You will notice each of these are intentional choices you have the ability to accept in every situation. When people choose to base their happiness on external situations, when their situation changes, their happiness changes as well.
This can be especially damaging if you have unrealistic expectations.
You will find yourself unhappy with something you should be thrilled about, because you are looking for an external validation that is impossible (or at least highly unlikely).
By choosing to remain in control of your feelings (without the need of external validation), you allow yourself to continually experience happiness.
Dre Griggs || Be More